Loved Ones!

I saw my son one last time today, If somebody take a knife and put it right in to my chest, the pain wouldn't be bigger than what I felt today. He was buried under ground,  a few house back of where we live. I saw him, the light on his eyes was gone! These shinny little beautiful eyes are not going to shine again! He was only 8 months and I loved him so much that I was scared to lose him so badly and eventually I did! God has a way telling things to us!
"He says don't attach to things too much I will take them from you!"
"Don't say my love, my son, my pet, they all belong to me like you belong to me! "
"He says don't say I cannot live without you , I will take the ones you love yet you will still move on!
"
I talked with the gardener guy who buried him. He was nice enough to bury him underground like God's other sons and daughters. I am at least happy to know where he is sleeping now but it still hurts. It hurts so badly! I think attaching anything doesn't make sense anymore! How a person who lost his kid, his spouse or his siblings can move on? How hard it must be to pass from the road every day where your loved ones died. How can you go to places that he or she loved to go without tears on your eyes? How can you cook or eat his/her favorite meal again? I know God has a purpose but I am having hard time to understand his reasons!

Did you Know?

picture source: https://www.pinterest.com/nickiz13/animals-in-need/

Did you know that a healthy female cat can give a birth for 100 babies in her lifetime?
Did you know that 6-8 million of cats and dogs end up in shelters each year only in US?
Did you know that these shelters are putting 2 million pets each year to sleep?
Did you know by only spaying and neutering  them, you could save 2 million dogs and cats from a certain death?

Goodbye My Kitty Cat

When you , my kitty joint to our family, you were a few weeks old. Before you, I didn’t know how it to have a cat was or dog in the family; it turned out it is one of the happiest things in this world. In the first weeks, you slept on my head. It was very funny for me! The next weeks, you slept right next to me. I was so scared to sleep on you, it took some time for me to get used to cuddle and sleep with you. There, we came to a point you started to take my pillow and my side of the bed shamelessly! Meanwhile, you were growing, your bones were getting thicker, your hair color was starting to get lighter. You were growing. I loved to watch you hunting us, playing with us, getting pissed with us! I loved to watch you sleeping in different positions. You were a professional yogic in my eyes! You could do all these stretching while I cannot even sit in lotus posture. You were my friend, my baby, my love! You were looking from window. You were dying to go out and play out there. I bought a leash for you! I was the only woman who is walking her cat in the neighborhood. I was transforming to a crazy cat lady slowly and It was because of you! I loved to be the crazy cat lady with you! Some people said to me, once he learns how it is outside, you cannot keep him inside and I said “whom I am to trap him inside all day?” I didn’t want you to leave a life against to your nature. I said I will not be a selfish bastard; I will try to give you best. I kept taking you out to parks, reservoirs and gardens. When we traveled from New York State to California, you were very lovely. You adopted in an hour to travel in the car, you told us when you needed to pee. You were a perfect kiddo! You were behaving well in the Motels we stayed. On the ways, we were having short breaks and taking you out, walking you! You were seeing all these beautiful mountains, canals, lakes… You were lying down in the back of the car, watching all these beauty with us! What a lovely week it was! After this trip, we arrived to always sunny California. It was very nice neighborhood, most of the time calm and quite. There were a few cars in our streets and many indoor-outdoor cats like you! It was a perfect place for you to chase your natural instincts and be your true self. You started to hang out in the backyard first days and then on the streets. You were going in the night that’s the time all cats are very active, walking , hunting, running, chasing things… and coming back in the mornings, Purring all the time till the time you fall asleep! I was waking up with your ‘Meowwwings’ with a smile on my face. You were making me so happy and you were being so happy to be home. After eating your food, you were allowing me to pet you! You were sleeping on my laps like a baby! You were my baby!  Till last Thursday! You left home as usual in the evening around 7 PM, You went in front of door and asked me to open the door for you. I kissed you as usual and asked you come home safe but you couldn’t. Some person hit you and ran away! They didn’t even bother their selves to call us, email us. You had a microchip and a name tag with my email. They didn’t even bother their selves to ask me to pick your dead body! I You had at least 12 years of cat life to live but selfish human beings, us didn’t let you to live! We selfish human beings! Later when I stated all these search for you, one woman who saw what happened called me! I couldn’t even see you one last time!  Anyways kiddo, we loved you a lot and I know you did love us too!

I will miss you!

your human mom